Monday, December 13, 2010

For Suck's Fake...

through the thickness of life, i’ve managed to end up back at the start again. it’s a monday, and right now i’m thinking of that movie, Groundhog Day. maybe i shouldn’t right it all off this early. i mean, it’s friggin’ monday!!! well anyway, this past weekend feels like it never happened. what the heck is wrong with me??? my gosh, i’m so tired. my eyes are burning and my bones feel weak. ambien is a heck of a drug. i kind of like it, but it’s not natural. neither are diet wheat pills.

if there was one thing that made the weekend a bit better, i would have to say it was play practice. sunday started with me going to church and feeling despondent like usual. i attribute this to the late night i spent partying at my best friends house. anyway, as i was sitting there, looking like a large pile of dirty socks, i noticed this new girl i’ve never seen there before. she came with this married couple i know. she looked to be about my age i guess. what caught my attention though, was how closely she resembled this other girl i met last year in california. strange as it may be, i had seen this new girl once. i believe it was at the oklahoma city indian clinic powwow. she sat a couple of rows in front of my family. she caught my attention back then as well, mostly for her shoes which looked like they belonged on a gladiator.

church ended like always and i drove home, stopping at kfc to “attempt” a meal. i think i gave it about 30 to 45 minutes before it all came back up and flushed away. man, i’m destroying myself. and here i’m admitting it on the internet. is there no shame??? of course there is, but i need to write something before i get to the music portion of this post. anyway, time passed as i watched Dinner for Schmucks, and i went back to church to practice. this proved to be the best part of the day. we all did our roles and chatted, laughing at our mistakes and the awkwardness. i’m feeling more and more proud to be a part of this event than i was on first thought. i’m not doing this for me, but for god. to keep the spirit of christmas alive…

ok, so who thought what i just wrote was totally cheesy??? (*raises hand*) yes, well it’s true though. despite what you read on here, i am christian and i don’t mind saying that. but of course, what would a blog be without drama right??? it’s those personal reflections that make people’s mouths wet for more. i guess that’s why memoirs are so popular. i just hope this stuff is more better and “real” than whatever some celebrity scumbag has written. those people don’t live like me.

oh, and today’s post is brought to you by the food product, “ding dongs.” a sweet, delicious, cream filled chocolate cake in a nice to-go package. ( i got’s a whole box o’ dem in my desk yar!!!)

earlier i was listening to a band called, The Dismemberment Plan and i think they are good for today.

this group, forming in 1993, hailed from washington, d.c.. they broke up in 2003, but have recently reunited for some sporadic anniversary shows. they are indie rock with a good mix of post-punk and 90’s emo. to date, they released five albums and several ep’s before ending. barsuk records recently re-issued their most popular album, Emergency and I, which is has gone on to become one of indie rocks best accomplishments. there isn’t much more for me to say here. if bands such as, Jawbox, The Promise Ring, Death Cab for Cutie, Fugazi, Q and Not U and, uh, i guess Moss Icon float your boat, then the dismemberment plan is blah blah blah dig it blah blah blah…

hopefully below you will find their third and best album, Emergency and I. the title is a play on the cult classic british film, Withnail and I. you all should go watch that. oh, and listen to this as well...

The only thing worse than bad memories
Is no memories at all
From the age of 20 to 22 I had five friends
None of whose names I can recall
And as I would walk down K Street to some temping job
As winter froze the life out of fall
Yeah, I must've been heaving a ball
Different scene outside your window now
Same VCR, same cats
Different people at the very same job
Similar alley, different rats
The trash goes out on a Tuesday now
You got to make a note about that
Yeah, this time you're where it's at
You can't say it but I know it's in there
You don't know it but I know that you're scared
Obvious and lonely a spider in the snow
Now you find the very same pit still yawns
Deep down within the very same gut
The very same ghosts still seem to haunt you down
Down those lines you always tried to cut
You thought you just might need a little change
And now you find you got nothing but
How can a body move the speed of light
And still find itself in such a rut?
You can't say it but I know it's in there
You don't know it but I know that you're scared
Obvious and lonely afraid to not let go
You can't say it but I know it's in there
You don't know it but I know that you're scared
Obvious and lonely a spider in the snow

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