Strung Out And Thin...

today was a thankful, yet humble day to be alive. we had our veteran's appreciation day at church as well as our annual thanksgiving dinner afterwords. i was glad to go this time since i have missed it the past four years while at college. when all was over with i went to the funeral home next door and visited with some old family friends who were grieving over their grandfather who had just passed away. it was a sad time, but also a good one. good in the fact that this old man who i have known for a long time had lived a great life and died in peace. he was one of the chilocco boarding school alumni who i have met over the years. those poor native children who went to the indian boarding schools hold a close relationship to one another. it was bittersweet and beautiful at the same time.

when i got home i decided to listen to some more mellow music than the harsher stuff of late. singer songwriter Elliot Smith was on today's music time for me and i had forgotten how great he really was.



now i like to say that music this melloncolie can not be too good to listen to when certain moods are about one's self, but that was not the case this time. the soft vocals of this young man stood out amongst the realities of today's pace and now, past memories. i was in a good mood for once when listening to this type of mellow music and i know for certain that this was something much more different than what has been goin' on in my life these past few weeks. the music was just there and not interfering with my life. it wasn't a stop sign to tell me where to go and how to feel. no, this time the music was just there to help me relax and feel at ease.

elliot smith is dead. he died at the age of 34 in los angeles by two stab wounds to the heart. the circumstances around his death are still being talked about today by family and fans alike. some have ruled it out to be a suicide (another one of my tragic hero's...) and others believe it to be murder. regardless of that which has happened, the music is what's important now, and what great music we have here for us.

this man created five albums in his time, whith two more released after his death. he is known for the song, "miss misery" from the movie Good Will Hunting for which he won a grammy. for me, i will always remember the song "needle in the hay" when it was used in the suicide scene from The Royal Tennabaums. richie says the line " i'm going to kill myself tomorrow," which is a quote from the french movie Le Feu Follet or The Fire Within, and then he proceeds to do himself harm. luckily bill murray was there to rush him to the hospital. the movie still stands as one of my favorites by wes anderson.

today i want to post my favorite elliot smith album. the wonderfull, yet emotional and tragically beautiful, Either-Or. this is probably his most popular album, but that doesn't take away from it's power. dig in deep and listen to a man on the edge of life, but don't linger there yourself because there is more to life than what's on the edge.


http://www.mediafire.com/?jhzuy4ho3uz

Your hand on his arm
The haystack charm around your neck
Strung out and thin
Calling some friend, trying to cash some check

He's acting dumb
That's what you've come to expect

Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay

He's wearing your clothes
head down to toes, a reaction to you
You say you know what he did
But you idiot kid, you don't have a clue

Sometimes they just get caught in the eye,
you're pulling him through

Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay

Now on the bus
Nearly touching this dirty retreat
Falling out 6th and powell, a dead sweat in my teeth
Gonna walk walk walk
Four more blocks, plus the one in my brain

Down downstairs to the man,
he's gonna make it all okay

I can't beat myself
I can't beat myself
And I don't want to talk
I'm taking the cure
So I can be quiet wherever I want

So leave me alone
You ought to be proud that I'm getting good marks

Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay
Needle in the hay

Busses No Busses...

i spent another saturday in seminole oklahoma. it was once again a falls creek meeting. i just love being on the board of members for falls creek. i can actually give back to the retreat in some sort of way since falls creek has always given so much to me. just going every summer is my favorite pastime as a child as well as an adult now. being around all the local oklahoma indian churches is something to truly behold, and with that i always come home feelin' even better than when i first got there. i have grown up going since the age of one and can literally only think of one year where i missed. i was 15 at the time and i had my first real job. it was horrible to miss, and i later came to find out that i could have gone if i wanted to, but i of course was too shy to ask...

ha ha, oh the error of my ways. i seem to make those kinds of mistakes quite often. it's like i miss the best things in life by not actually trying to do anything about it. who knows what i'm missing right now as i type this... the world is passing me by and i get older each day. i'm halfway in my twenties and still at home tryin' to get myself in order. i just hope that some of those dreams i have had come true in some sort of way. oh, and those dreams of mine are big, but not too big.

i of course like screamo/skrams music and have recently come to know that there still are some bands out there trying their best to make that style of music as good as it was back in the 90's and such. today, a lot of people tend to just call it post-hardcore, but whatever. i actually hate that one term above all. well, i take that back. i hate the term crunkcore more than the other. if you want to know what that term is, just type it on youtube, sit back and listen to the worlds worst music.

anyway, here is an emo/screamo/skrams band that has gained a huge cult following and, like most great bands i list, no longer together. for you today is Bear vs Shark.



these guys were from highland michigan and short lived. they became know for their intense live shows (that almost sounds cliche...) and distinct sounds. siting The Clash, Fugazi, and Motown as their main influences, this band carved a quick path though early 2000's hardcore scene by staying true to their own style and pace. in 2005 they announced they were breaking up and this happened a month before i was about to see them in new mexico. i was of course angry at this. so here's to hope that they will re-unite in the near future and play a few shows for those who missed them before. it's a shame because they seemed to always be playing nearby and i always chose to not go and see them. so here is some advice for you people out there. if there is a band coming to your state and it's during whenever, go and see them if you have not before. because you will never know when that particular artist will no longer be...



okay, so here is the music. in their short time the band released one ep, and two full length albums. skipping the ep, here for you is their debut album with the absurdly long title, but shortened here, Right Now, You're In The Best Of Hands... and then their second and last album titled Terrorhawk. these two albums go hand-in-hand as one complete masterpiece by the band. they work so well together that it's almost like a double album. anyway, here are the tunes and here is your chance!!!


http://www.mediafire.com/?fn2wzmgjm5y


http://www.mediafire.com/?9mnxhdam2yf



live life to the fullest...

Ceremony...

i got to sub again today. this time it was a history class, but still all freshmen students. i was more able to be in control this time. i didn't take any crap and i spoke loudly, but not in a crazy angry sort of way. it felt amazing to actually get these kids to listen and do their work. i know this is all just the steppin' stones towards something much bigger, but still it is a lot to take in and i love to learn important life lessons. this i know, will be my life for now. i think i'm goin' in the right direction.

okay, so to continue off the past two posts with artists i have forgotten to post on, here is one more i have mentioned before. these guys were big in the 80's and originated from the highly influential band Joy Division. after the tragic suicide of lead singer ian curtis, members bernard sumner, peter hook, and stephan morris decided to keep goin', but change their name. thus, we now have New Order.



oh, and the girl in that picture is gillian gilbert who played on keyboard. yes, the remaining members of joy division kept their same jobs and lineup situation with drums, bass and guitar, but it was bernard sumner who stepped up to take on the shoes left by curtis. and what big shoes those were to fill!!! in real early footage you can see sumner look a little shaky and intimidated by the new role as lead singer, but eventually it all worked out and the transition was good.

the band became one of the biggest acts in the 80's nu-wave scene and sold many albums and played many shows. the single for the song "blue monday" was the biggest selling 12" single of all time. around the latter 90's and 2000's the band started to play joy division songs in their sets, which was a point they tried to stay away from for many many years. in 2007 hook left the band and sumner decided to stop doing music as new order. he and morris started a new group called Bad Lieutenant and recently released their debut album Never Cry Another Tear.

posted today is their famous double album collection titled Substance 1987. this is a collection of most of their then released singles and accompanying b-sides. standout songs include the last joy division song ian curtis wrote titled "ceremony" as well as "blue monday" and "temptation". this is some really great music and i hope you all give it a chance. get into it and dance to the grooves!!!


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=VCSP6QJ1 (disc 1)
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=E5FGFKH3 (disc 2)

This is why events unnerve me,
They find it all, a different story,
Notice whom for wheels are turning,
Turn again and turn towards this time,
All she ask's the strength to hold me,
Then again the same old story,
World will travel, oh so quickly,
Travel first and lean towards this time.

Oh, I'll break them down, no mercy shown,
Heaven knows, it's got to be this time,
Watching her, these things she said,
The times she cried,
Too frail to wake this time.

Oh I'll break them down, no mercy shown
Heaven knows, it's got to be this time,
Avenues all lined with trees,
Picture me and then you start watching,
Watching forever, forever,
Watching love grow, forever,
Letting me know, forever.

Your palms are sweaty...

hmm... what to write what to write. i really have no idea as to what's on my mind at the moment. i guess i could say i'm a little disappointed that i chose to sleep in today when i could have gone to sub. i hit the ignore button on my phone and just kept on sleepin'. well i know for sure that tomorrow i will go sub if i get the chance. i really need to shape up and be willing to work in order to accomplish future goals. ugh, it's just so big and i can't seem to figure it all out. well i do know that life isn't supposed to be that easy anyway. if it was then why would we be here to begin with anyway??? what would be the point??? blah blah blah...

since i posted on Beck yesterday it made me remember another artist collective that i have mentioned before. here for your listening pleasure is The Postal Service.



this freekishly popular two man project is fronted by ben gibbard of Death Cab for Cutie fame and jimmy tamborello of Dntel. this project started as home demos sent back-and-forth through the mail to each other over the course of a few years. hence the name postal service. this group makes indie/dance pop music which is currently seeing a rise in the scene. artist like and Owl City and Lights both use the same types of computerized beats and chorus with soft vocals and great pop sensibility. the thing is, those artists aren't original. it was this group who did it first. oh, and don't get me started on that metalcore band called Confide and their terrible cover of the postal service song "such great heights". ugh, it's music like that that makes me want to vomit and punch a scenester in the face...

so here for ya is their one and only album, Give Up. this is really relaxing music and one that can help you through a tough day at school, work, and even home. so enjoy and relax!!!


http://www.mediafire.com/?1yhujogzmzz

stay easy...

Paper Tigers...

well i now have enough money to purchase Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2!!! so yeah, i'm totally stoked like all get out. i'm gonna go to the midnight launch at my local wall-mart and get that sucker early. the following tuesday i'm not going to sub or do anything but play that game. first i'll go through the campaign, then i'll hit up the multiplayer for a bit just to get the feel of it, then it's back to the campaign and then back to the multiplayer for the brutal assault on the senses and mind!!! oh yeah, this is gonna be zoppity!!!

i think my little bug has left. i don't feel as bad as i did last night and the day before. actually i feel quite good for once. last night i had a good talk with a close friend of mine and it reminded me of so much stuff that had happened in my life over the past four years. some were sad and some were great. it's the great one's that i remembered the most. it was fun to reminisce about old times and then tell each other goofy jokes. it's like we never missed a day with each other. hmm... these times are really confusing. so much stuff to think about and do. it's all pretty thick i guess. life is pretty thick...

well now, it looks like i'm finally going to post an artist that i have mentioned before, but have not thought about for a while until now. this singer-songwriter mad quite the impression on me when i was younger and just getting into music on my own. but, it wasn't until my first year of art school when my old friend frank introduced me to this man's most personal album. the album in question is called Sea Change and the artist is simply known as Beck.



you see, it was late one night when frank asked me if i could take him into town to grab something to eat. i was hungry as well, so i was all like "cool man". heh heh so we left and frank told me he brought some tunes for us to jam. well i had just gotten done watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind for the first time, so my head and heart were a bit light at the moment. frank puts in the cd and as soon as i heard the vocals kick in i asked "who the heck is this???" he laughed and said, "dude, it's beck!!!"

it was after this that i asked him for a copy of the cd. i jammed that thing for probably a month straight. now, like when i listened to Nick Drake all the time i have to declare that this much melancholy music sometimes can't be good for you. and let me tell ya, this was such sad sorrowful music, but also beautiful in it's simplicity and arrangement that it took the cake. after a while, i stopped listening to the album and put it away for quite some time. it wasn't until my fourth and last year that i got it back out and listened to it once again. oh man, how it helped, but also hurt. i never in my wildest mind could have pictured that skinny stoner singer named beck singing his heart out over love and loss. he felt the same way i did during the aftermath of a bad breakup. this was something otherworldly. and i guess i was the only one who felt this way at the time. at least i think i was...

there isn't much else for me to say at the moment. despite this man's personal life, his music speaks louder than anything else he does. these three albums i'm posting are shining moments in my life and i hope you all will take the time to listen to them. here are my faves: Mellow Gold, Odelay!, and the wonderful and tragic Sea Change.


http://www.mediafire.com/?mxmfzyryqwt


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=HMQMAADY


http://www.megaupload.com/?d=ww6lsnky

Put your hands on the wheel
Let the golden age begin
Let the window down
Feel the moonlight on your skin
Let the desert wind
Cool your aching head
Let the weight of the world
Drift away instead

These days I barely get by
I don't even try

It's a treacherous road
With a desolated view
There's distant lights
But here they're far and few
And the sun don't shine
Even when its day
You gotta drive all night
Just to feel like you're ok

These days I barely get by
I don't even try

Sick Day...

it seems i have come down with some sort of bug... i don't like being sick. my throat is sore and my head is more heavy than usual. my head actually feels like a fishbowl, with my brain sloshing around in it's own liquid. as i type this the classic movie Arachnophobia is on. i think it was maybe this movie that made me terrified of spiders, or maybe i was scared of them all along. ugh, i hate spiders.

oh, so last night i went to the movies with my grandma despite feeling like total crap. it was really fun!!! a lot more fun than i thought it would be. plus you can't beat free passes!!! i arrived in brick town (downtown okc) at about five or so to meet up with her and eat at spaghetti warehouse. the lasagna there is amazing!!! after that we drove a few blocks down to the theater and waited in line to see jim carrey play in the new computerized version of A Christmas Carol. now i will go ahead and say that this movie was way better than i thought it would be going in. i judged it all based on the trailer i saw a few weeks earlier. it was loud, fast, and freekin' annoying. but this movie proved to be better than that. the pace was set nicely and the characters were actually quite funny. all three ghosts of christmas were done by carrey himself, and when you see him as scrooge you believe it.

robert zemeckis has done three films so far i think, that use live action mixed with the cg computer graphics of company's like pixar and dream works. those other two films seemed a bit creepy, but i think they finally perfected it this time. i have seen multiple versions of a christmas carol and this one is now one of the best. i recommend it for anybody. oh, and they gave us free 3d glasses too!!!

heh heh, now as a type this actor jeff daniels is goin' one-on-one with the big daddy spider in the movie. funny how the characters in that spider movie are complete idiots at the end. the man is literally being thrown to the ground after fighting the spider in the cellar of his house. now its staring at him with its many eyes. oooooo the dramatic pose of the spider!!! the music swells up and then jeff pushes down on a piece of wood sending the spider flying into a small fire. the spider then rushes out screaming its head off!!! now the finishing move happens as jeff quickly picks up his nail gun and shoots the spider sending it flying towards the huge egg sack and making it explode upon impact. the end... what a classically dumb movie that was. still, i remember it fondly. ha ha

well now, how about some music??? here is a band i found sort of by accident even though i knew of them before. you see, i was doing some searching around for some old 90's emo music at a local fye store and i couldn't find anything on my list. when browsing through the letter "a" section i stumbled upon this band. now i knew this was something worth getting simple because i have heard of them in connection with other similar artists i knew and also because i liked their name. so without further ado, here is The Appleseed Cast.



this band started in 1997 and currently hails from lawrence kansas, the hometown of The Get Up Kids, and Coalesce among others. they have that heavy 90's emo sound and are very similar to other such artists as the wonderful Mineral and Sunny Day Real Estate. in two of the albums i'm posting here the band went all out and tried the post-rock sound to a degree and got away with it. those two albums titled Low Level Owl Vol. 1-2 showcase the band trying something dramatically different and yet being themselves and pushing the boundaries of their art and talent.

enough with all the description, here is the music!!! that album i found the the record store is the first one here, and their debut which is awesomely titled The End of the Ring Wars. second and third is the already mentioned Low Level Owl Vol. 1-2 and last is the album Two Conversations. so with that go ahead and get down with it and enjoy some emotional music with soul.


http://www.mediafire.com/?lmfyj3zymzn


http://www.mediafire.com/?oymeidnwlnw


http://www.mediafire.com/?fnubyp0zipd


http://www.mediafire.com/?z2c2gyz0hzz

fall down
marigold
fall sounds of rain
why can't i go
those days when spokes wound baseball cards tear hear them roar
and faster still those boards which let fly souls
honeysuckle walk right afternoon time dies
wish for sometime soon
i'll work it out
my way
so many faces
so lost
why can't i go back when this mess was not made
forever turns out just the same as two months
that rages on then after

Let it burst and bloom...

november is here finally, and with that comes the reality check that freekin' CALL OF DUTY: MODERN WARFARE II drops this month!!! holy crap i'm excited for it!!! time to get back into the groove of a new fps shooter and dominate the multiplayer world. this time i'm not just gonna stop after a few prestige modes. no, this time i'm gonna rank all the way to the top of the lists and then whenever people look at the online rankings they will see my name at the uppermost part. the name EATDOGS will be known all over the world. i will be the call of duty master!!! try and stop me and you will be served!!!

okaaaaayyyyyyy, so the month of november also brings the thanksgiving holidays. i like this holiday simply because of the food quantities and the nice change of scenery and weather. here in oklahoma we have very strange weather, but also nice weather. it's always a mixed bag. i remember one year when i was a youngling, the weather being so strange in just one week. first we had chilly cold air and wind, then we had lots of rain mixed with sleet, then it turned into an ice storm then it ended with snow all over. this happened in just one week. yeah, so oklahoma is like that sometimes. you know, one of those sporadic places where you don't quite know whats goin' on unless you have lived there for many years. (new mexico became that for me...)

this post is gonna a be a bit short, so right now i want to go ahead and skip to the music. here is the wonderful band Cursive.



i love this band because singer tim kashner writes some really personal profound lyrics that i instantly connected with. these lyrics became an outlet for me when i was going through a rough patch in my personal life. (bad breakup...) this band hails from omaha nebraska and releases albums on coner oberst's own saddle creek records. the band formed in 1995 after the breakup of tim's and coner's previous band Commander Venus. these guys play indie/emo rock with great passion and huge talent. recent releases have showcased the band mixing some country and folk styles into their already big gene pool.

so here are the albums i hail as their best by the band. first is the bands debut lp titled Such Blinding Stars for Starving Eyes, then we have the famous and my personal favorite album Domestica, and then third is one of the best ep's ever made (in my opinion) Burst and Bloom, and last is the groundbreaking and highpoint of the bands career, The Ugly Organ. so with that i want you all to choose carefully and give these guys a listen. domestica is the ultimate breakup album and one that i'm glad to have had at the time when i needed it...


http://www.mediafire.com/?egbs3oyzmnx


http://www.mediafire.com/?tthdztfgz2w


http://www.mediafire.com/?f2njxtbbo1y


http://www.mediafire.com/?dhc7stningk

The night has fallen down the staircase
And I, for one, have felt its bruises
Equilibrium; inebriated
Our social graces have been displaced

As we sink deeper into the drink
The volume increases....
Night time resurrects fault lines
Silent wars -- rumble somewhere below
The surfaces verses...
The surfaces verses...
The shoe is dropped, lungs explode
Shards of words of a shattered voice
And there's still a hole where the phone was thrown

Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah...
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah...

The moon is rising, a revolution
I close my eyes and the room is spinning
You're screaming:

"Sweetie, the moon has raped me --
It has left its seeds like a tomb inside me
So I must learn to abort these feelings
This romance is bleeding..."

Night time triggers the land mines
Bedroom wounds -- lovers like brigadiers
Marching two by two...
Marching two by two...
A soldier's down
Flood gates burst
I've said some things I wish you'd never heard
Like, "There's still a hole where the phone was thrown."
It's growing as we speak
And it's sucking us both in
A vacuum of sorrow to swallow up the day